Sunday, July 6, 2008

What do you mean I can't date until I'm 16?

Okay, I am a little freaked out about a new change in behavior that Sam has had! He use to tell me about his friends that are "girl lovers" at school. He let me know all of the time that he is definitely not one of them. . . then today happened.
Elle and Elaina are two little girls that live in the house right behind us and come over to play all of the time. Sometimes Sam is interested in playing but mostly he acts annoyed that they are here to play again. It is Emily that loves to play. They were over today playing in our backyard and I guess Sam saw them out his window. He came downstairs and asked me where his tie was. ??? I told him where they were and a few minutes later he comes down wearing a long sleeve button up "fancy shirt." ???Whoowhut??? Sam hates "fancy, handsome" shirts!!! Danny and I asked what he was up to and he just gave us a funny smile and went out to play.

Then he comes in and tells me I really need to bring out the camera and take pictures of him and Elle. ???Whooowhat??? Elaina wanted to have her picture taken with him also but he just told her no thanks. I took some pictures and he was WAY TOO FRIENDLY!

Then Elle told me I needed to see them dance. Sam didn't want to show me but I insisted. I needed to see what they were up to. They told me she taught him in the garage!!!! ???Whoowhat???

We brought Sam in to have a talk and he said he just thought she looked so pretty today and wanted to date. ??? He was surprised to hear that wasn't going to happen until he was 16 and then only in groups. We talked to him a little about what he was feeling but honestly I was at a loss for words. I just told him to make good choices and that he was too little to be worried about girls. "But mom, she just looked so pretty today." ???? Danny and I watched them closely all afternoon. They kept holding hands or Sam would put his arm around her or gently guide her with his arm to where they were going. A couple of times they just sat by each other on the steps. We just kept telling them to go play and they would quickly seperate like they had been caught at something. I have no clue where he learned to "Court" a girl like this other then from watching the adults around him.

Help!!! I really don't know what else to tell him other then it is not appropriate for him to have girl friends at this age and that he shouldn't be acting like a 20 something. I don't want him to feel like he ever has to hide his feelings from me and that he can talk to me about anything but he is 7! I thought he was supposed to hate girls. As soon as they went home for dinner Sam changed into something more comfortable.
Just so you know when I took the pictures and video it seemed so innocent it was in the few minutes afterward looking at them that I was like ???WWWHHHAAATTT???


Hatsuho said...

Hopefully this is just a phase! Cute though... Where DO they learn these things? I had my first boyfriend when I was 8... Haha, and I think I turned out ok:)

Dalyce said...

wow, you've got your hands full. Kinda funny though.
Sorry no advice from me, I would be at a loss for words too.

Brandon and Carly said...

I am not sure if you remember, but Bailee has had "boyfriends" since she was 4!!!! She has always thought boys were cute, and every year has picked one in her class to call her "boyfriend." But, we have gradually formed rules as things have come up. For a while, in Kindergarten, she used to call Connor Symmonds her boyfriend, and he was the first one who liked her back. But, being the fickle little girl she is, she found a new boyfriend, and broke Connors heart. It was so sad!! So, rule #1 is You can have a boyfriend, but you can't tell him he is your boyfriend. (Now that has evolved into her just telling me she has a crush.) Rule #2 NO KISSING or holding hands - - we only do that with our family. Rule #3 no playing alone with a boyfriend. (We have a neighbor boy that she would always ask to play with and then they would go somewhere alone, just to talk. But, it looked a little too grown up for me!) We modify the rules as things come up, but they have helped. It seems sad to limit them to only playing with the same sex, but we don't want them to grow up too fast either! That is where the "no being alone" rule came from.

The biggest thing that I had to learn is that, even though they may look like how an adult would act, they are just mimicking things they have seen on TV, on the streets, etc. The feelings aren't behind it! Creating rules is a good way to set boundaries, without overreacting!

P.S. Sooooooo cute, though! Good luck!

MetroParks said...

Just so you all know we were also laughing our heads off about this, there is just something else inside saying Whoa!

The Campbell's said...

Oh, no you are in trouble now!!!

Jake and Nicole said...

I was looking at this with my mom and we were dying!!!! So funny! Good luck, I will learn from you!

The JL McGregor Family said...

So cute and funny! I especially like the dancing. I did like the rules that brandon and carly set out...I think I might use those someday myself.

bcharrington said...

I wouldn't worry too much. He still young. Sarah at 4 years old told me with tears in her eyes. "Mommy but I love him" about another kid in her pre-school class. And she was very serius. I asked her now about him and she doens't remmeber his name. I will keep the communication open, it always helps. And continue to remind him of the house rules.
I can't help to think that is too cute

Sherrie Thuernagle said...

Sarah...Sam is quite the dancer though. :) Maybe in a few years you should put him into ballroom. But seriously, I have no idea what to say! Maybe it is just a phase, like Hatsuho said...something that caught his fancy and his mind just hung onto it...and when he finds something more interesting he'll forget all about it.